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Monday, October 19, 2015

WHEREFORE ART THOU STUBBORN,O BELOVED?

“Where art thou , o Beloved ? Why did thou leave me  in this tempest of suffering when I needed thou the most ? Wasn’t my integrity preserved with utmost care, enough for thou to be proud? Is my purity of body, mind and soul, withheld all these years for thy disposal too much to handle ?
Where have thou disappeared ?  Thou makes all the worldly chores along with my help, but is lost somewhere in thy own world. Am I being ignored purposely or have thou moved on, leaving me where we had begun ?

I wait for a vocal conversation, where we will clear all our doubts. Come, o Dear, let me make thou free from all the things that make your life a dark pitch. The tread of our life together worries me. Where are we heading ? Have we lost the way and hindered our growth ? I wait for thy words to flow like a gushing waterfall in front of me. Allow me to be drenched in thy words. Give me that respite o Beloved, and speak, for thy silence cuts me to the core like a barbed wire.

While thou enjoys the sweetest dreams in the darkness of the night,I wait for thou to wake up with a smile and remove all the doubts. I wait for that day when all the secrets will be spoken and we will head on our journey, just the two of us.

Aren’t we two parts of a single soul? Why are we still wandering in opposite directions? I tried finding thee,o Beloved, but it looked like thou had already left the place from where we had started. The scars on thou scare me, for they affect us both.

I yearn for thy love, o Beloved, will I not get a pinch of it? I tried and oh yes I tried, to make thou happy and see a smile on thy lovely face, but alas! Thou never seemed to understand the depth of my efforts and my deepest love for thee.

Oh! And yes, how can I not speak about that lovely face that I admire? How can I not stare at it when thou is sound asleep? The face is that like of an angel, like a child sleeping peacefully, hands thrown above head as if thou has no care of the world. Those ever curious eyes that speak volumes during the day, finally take rest in the darkness of the night. And that sweet gurgling sound that thou makes, in sleep. I have lost count of the number of times I have lain awake to see this beautiful sight and hear the gurgling sound. The sound is a pleasant song to my ears.

Yes, thou is not entirely at fault. My harsh tone arising out of frustration radiated due to thou scars.
But why dost thou not understand that it is out of concern and my overwhelming desire to know more about thee and understand- else how shall we proceed with our journey? Think of me as a jackfruit, prickly from the outside while soft on the inside. Why dost thou not understand one half of your soul?

And why dost thou seem intent on changing me? Why make me a person which I cannot be? Why doesn't thou accept me unchanged like how I do with thee?

As I wait and wait for thou to be mine, I know that this perfect union is impossible. Yet I do not lose hope and stand watching the rain soothe the hot roads outside, and think of all the good times we could have, yes, just the two of us.