DEC POST 7 : Day 6 Of my Self Challenge

TO FOLLOW THE CROWD OR TO CHOOSE YOUR OWN PATH?

I chose the road which the crowd chose. I knew I could do something better and different than the crowd but the route was different; not the usual road. I could have done it few years back. I was working on it; Oh wait! No. I wasn’t working as such. It came to me naturally, as if in my blood. I didn’t have to put special efforts for it being my passion. But then, I lost touch. I saw the crowd and I walked like a zombie with the rest. I didn’t give much thought. I do not regret the decision. Because I diverted a bit only to joined the rest back again. Why did I divert? I wanted to be in crowd but by taking a different route. But the path I wanted was always on the opposite side.

Was I running after fame and glory? Naah.. I understand, all that glitters is not gold. Is it because of that realisation that I chose to follow the crowd?

I see people of my age waving hands to the public in the world of glamour, travelling alone and getting a chance to meet “who’s who” of the Page 3. Do I want this? No. That would make my life hell. I knew it from beginning. Is this why I chose to follow the crowd? So that I am in the safe space?

“Touch up” and “re-touch up”.. Go with a smiling face and have a sip of champagne and fake a laughter at the sleazy joke my competitor cracked while in my mind I am having  insecurity since she is my competitor. Was this a reason strong enough for me to go with the crowd?

What I wanted was completely different. Following the crowd has given me a backup. Like I said I do not regret it. But in this game of race, I feel I lost my passion somewhere on the way. So should I still follow the crowd or go with my passion? Or should combine my passion with the path that I followed with the crowd?